Monday, January 17, 2011

C.A.R.R.O.T. Jetpack

Woomi and I were fighting over the extra-buttery popcorn when the doorbell rang.


On my doorstep, a familiar briefcase:


Inside, baby carrots:



Like most people who crochet, I double as an international spy.


And this top secret letter surely held a special assignment for Woo... Agent Woo.


The following is a transcript of this letter, for your eyes only:

ATTN: AGENT WOO

I'm OOW (Agent Double-O Double-U), and your mission is to test the energy-potential of beta-carotene for above-ground transportation.

Agent Woo, please follow these step-by-step instructions:

Step One: Extract the contents from the briefcase.




Step Two: Equip yourself with the Agency's latest prototype in renewable-energy stealth-wear: The C.A.R.R.O.T. Jetpack.


The Crocheted Aerodynamic Renewable Resource Offsite Transport Jetpack is powered by beta-carotene. A handful of carrots can provide up to one hour of air travel.


(Optional sources of beta-carotene include yams, spinach, turnip greens, winter squash, cantaloupe, and romaine lettuce.)


Step Three: Take a running leap from this launch site. Repeat until lift-off.




Step Four: Steering the C.A.R.R.O.T. Jetpack can be initially challenging. Try visualizing yourself flying above the clouds.





Step Five: In the unlikely chance the Jetpack malfunctions, follow the contingency plans in Step Six.

Step Six: Hand out baby carrots to passersby at this rendezvous point.


This act will signal to the Agency that the Jetpack requires additional testing. It is imperative that you wear the included head-mounted antennae.


As a secondary signal, post an on-site photo of yourself to WooWork.com.


The Agency appreciates your loyal service, Agent Woo. You mission with the C.A.R.R.O.T. Jetpack will be challenging, but it is an assignment you deserve to complete.

Until then,

I'M OOW


ShareThis